Treasured Birthday Party Memories

Cherish all your happy moments; they make a fine cushion for old age. — Booth Tarkington

Celebrating birthdays is such a joy and blessing whether it’s your own you’re celebrating or that of a cherished family member or friend. I have three stories today of special birthdays shared by those who took my newsletter challenge to share a birthday story.

As we all remember, 2020 brought about changes in the ways we normally did almost everything. The world shut down. Everything was canceled. No ball games. No church services. No wedding guests. No graduation services. No birthday parties. We lost so many celebrations of life. While life seemed to screech to a halt, people did still have birthdays. One of my granddaughters had a front porch birthday with us grandparents bringing presents and then watching from out in the yard while she opened them. We gave air hugs. We didn’t have cake and ice cream. But she still had a birthday.

Melissa shares that same kind of unusual birthday celebration in 2020.

A birthday I’ll never forget has to be 2020. My birthday is always on or near Memorial Day weekend and I turned 40 that year. Of course we couldn’t have a big party, so my family made a big deal, and made a sign to put in our yard to honk to say Happy Birthday to me. At first I kinda rolled my eyes, but it actually turned out quite fun! We live in a lakeside community in the country and all day long my neighbors honked and waved as I sat on my deck and read a book. It was a good day!

My sister-in-law had that kind of special birthday celebration for her mother’s 95th birthday. I think it was 95, but in her 90s for sure. Friends drove by and waved and honked. I think, like Melissa, she enjoyed the day even if those kind of air hugs aren’t as good as the close encounter type.

The next story from Robin shows that we need to treasure every moment of time spent with those we love. None of us are promised tomorrow and sometimes that tomorrow with a loved one is taken from us before we are ready.

One Birthday that I will always remember is not one of mine but one of my mom’s. We always get together on Birthdays. The birthday person picks what we eat and what kind of cake. October of 2019 was no different really. My mom picked chicken and dumplings and chocolate cake. We ate, we talked and we enjoyed the day. The day passed so quickly and before we knew it we were hugging and saying our goodbyes. I would talk to my mom on the phone several more times and texts here and there and she sent me something in the mail but I would never see her in person again. Life gets busy. Before we knew it a month had gone by and I got a call from my dad saying that she passed away in her sleep almost a month after her birthday celebration. I am so thankful we got to celebrate together one last time. 

While Robin didn’t know that she was celebrating a birthday with her mother for the last time, sometimes we do know the end is coming. Mom and my sisters always celebrated our birthdays together. Such fun over the years, but when Mom’s health declined and dementia stole her memory, birthday celebrations weren’t the same. It was easy to see into the future and know there wouldn’t be many more birthdays with her.

Kayla knew the same as she watched her father getting older, but she was happy to celebrate his 90th birthday with a party. Here’s her lovely and touching story of that party and her father’s last years.

One of my best birthday memories is a birthday I held for my father on his 90th birthday. His health had begun fading, stage 4 kidney disease. He was a cancer survivor, as well as a 4 way bypass survivor. He was the son of a dairy farmer and decided he wanted to “continue the tradition” but instead of dairy, beef cattle. He always told me he began working as soon as he could carry a 5 gallon bucket and said he remembers doing that at age 5. He was a hard worker, both as a child, teenager, adult and all the way up to around age 89. That work ethic carried on to me and my son (his grandson he always called “the boy.”) When his health began to decline, he could no longer climb up on the tractor and that broke his heart. He was happiest on the tractor. My son and I lifted him onto the tractor one last time. I’m thinking daddy had just turned 89, and he helped my son cut hay. But after that, he just wasn’t physically able to even ride the tractor, the jostling took a huge toll on him. I had always promised daddy I’d give him a “big 90th” birthday party. He would turn 90 on June 2, 2019, and I had hoped I’d be able to do the same with his 100th birthday. Daddy’s health declined quite significantly, to where we had to assist him in walking, moving from bed to chair, etc. I planned his 90th birthday party, all the while watching his health decline more and more. At one point he said he didn’t want the party, but the next moment he would agree, as long as I’d keep it “small.” Well, I was able to prepare and hold the 90th birthday party for my father. Family and close friends were invited. The attendance was kept small and the “food” was light refreshments. The party was held at my parents’ home in the front yard under the huge (HUGE) maple trees. There were times that daddy seemed to recognize everyone, although his voice was slight and sometimes only a whisper. There were times I saw the tears falling down his face, this was a momentous moment for him and for us; I was honored to be able to do this for my daddy. There were even times he dozed off, and after about an hour and a half I knew that daddy was getting very, very tired, so I quietly started to tell folks that daddy was getting tired & he was going to rest but they were welcome to stay as long as they wanted. It wasn’t much longer before daddy said he was ready to go inside and lay down, so I and my husband assisted him with going into the house and getting in the bed. Some of our guests left at that time, and some stayed and visited with us a while longer. Shortly after his party, daddy’s health declined more and more to where he was bedridden. I was blessed with being able to assist my mother in daddy’s care until the day he gained his angel wings and entered the gates of Heaven. We said our final goodbye to my sweet, hard working daddy on July 4, 2020. To date, that has been one of the hardest moments of my life and writing this, the tears are falling. Being able to celebrate daddy’s 90th birthday was a blessing and an honor that I will never forget.

Thank you for sharing your stories, Melissa, Robin and Kayla. Birthday memories are to be treasured.

To me a birthday means celebrating the presence of an individual in our lives. – Meena Bajaj

Do you remember some special birthdays with your parents? 

My newsletter giveaway is drawing to a close. Deadline to enter is September 30, 2022 at midnight EST. Here’s a link to the newsletter if you’d like to read it and get in a last minute entry if you haven’t already entered. Then next week I hope to start a fall giveaway here on One Writer’s Journal. Books as prizes, of course.